nigella, i wish i could quit you

One of the three or so tolerable TV stations we get here at the apartment is Discovery Travel & Living, and all I have to say is that if I hear this woman say "juice" or "juicy" ONE MORE TIME I think I may have to go on a murderous rampage:



I'd heard of Ms. Lawson before, of course, but I'd never seen her show till the other night when Misti and I caught the tail end of an episode that was all about craving sweet carbs at midnight and whipping yourself up a quick pan of Doughnut French Toast. At first we thought she meant she was making French toast OUT OF DOUGHNUTS, which made us shout at the TV, "Why don't you just EAT THE DAMN DOUGHNUT IF YOU'VE ALREADY GOT IT?!" But then it turned out the point was you were craving a doughnut, but it was midnight, so you had to make due with doughnuty-tasting French toast. Or something like that.

Anyway, now I am on Nigella like white on rice, except in that trainwrecky "don't make me look no wait don't make me not look!!" sort of way. I love her voluptuous bod, but I hate her vocal mannerisms. I don't care for the decidedly vegan-unfriendly nature of the show (for example, a few minutes ago I had to endure the sight of her stuffing bacon into the cavity of a chicken), but it's not like here in India I have the ingredients or equipment to do any real cooking anyway (granola bars for dinner again?). Perhaps I should just hit the mute button and enjoy her silently delicious hips.